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I bet you conservatives were worried about sitting on your couch on election night, crying in your beer after a devastating loss to either Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama.

Well now there is absolutely no reason for concern! For no matter what happens on election night you will be crying in your beer.

According to you, the only three Presidential candidates remaining are liberal commies unworthy of the Oval Office. Yes, that includes the eventual Republican nominee, John McCain.

I hope you have some good books to read during the next few months, because you don't have a single horse in this race.

On election night, go ahead and make a reservation at a restaurant where it's really difficult to get a table! While the rest of us will be watching the results in hopes our candidate wins you can get an early start on drowning your sorrows in alcohol because you're sad America will no longer be torturing people solely based on the fact that they have dark skin.

You knew it was going to happen.

You knew there would be consequences of the Bush Administration. You can't run the country into the ground and tell us we're on cloud nine, then expect us to give you another chance.

Starting January 20, 2009, as was the case when Clinton was President, you will create things to bitch about.

The country will be in good shape financially, respected around the world, and minorities from the West Coast to the East Coast will have an opportunity to succeed in life. But those things will not satisfy you, because it will be the policy of someone you oppose who will have succeeded in bringing those achievement to our great country, and you won't be able to handle that.

So you will lie, though you lie so much you won't even realize you're doing it.

"Barack Obama did this," you will say, or, "Hillary Clinton did that," or even, "John McCain, the war hero who I only agree with 80% if the time, which is not enough, was involved with such and such scandal involving the Boy Scouts and a bottle of Boone’s Farm."

But until then you will have to sit there and watch us heartfelt Americans decide who we want to lead us, with the unfortunate knowledge that it will be someone with whom you strongly disagree.